Over the years, I've learned a lot from the Muppets. And no, I'm not just talking about piddly little things like... y'know... spelling, numbers, colors, or Gilbert and Sullivan show tunes as sung by giant cucumbers.No, I'm talking about the really useful stuff!
- There is currently no 12-step program for cookie addiction. And self-regulating cookie addicts fall off the wagon hard.
- You really can put lipstick on a pig-- though they prefer to play up the eyes.
- If you don't like one of your facial features, swap with a friend. This is the trick your plastic surgeon doesn't want you to know.
- Speaking the local language is no prerequisite for having a successful career in the chemical sciences or television cookery industries.
- Prop comics from the Vaudevillian school can be bearable in the right medium.
- City pigeons make great pets, though with improper handling they can cause jaundice.
- "Mnah-Mnah" are magic words that can make even the most tone-deaf person sing.
- Throwing an effective boomerang fish requires a very smooth snap of the wrist. Also, probably, thumbs.
- Nepotism is even found in the frog species, particularly in show business.
- Never hire a demolition company whose founder's legal first name is "Crazy."
And lastly:
- When playing a reed based woodwind instrument, it is always prudent to be rubber-duck-free....
Enjoy!
