Arnout Aben's Fleeing Circus


Is it a real news article or the next animated picture from Pixar? The Associated Press reported today that a number of animals broke out of a traveling Dutch circus, with the giraffe as the apparent ringleader.

The furry jail-breakers included:
  • One giraffe
  • 15 camels
  • Two zebras and
  • An "undetermined number of llamas and potbellied swine"
I like that the llamas and potbellied pigs were of an "undetermined number." Perhaps they kept swapping IDs and using false-nose disguises behind the backs of the local police.

Policeman: You with the mustache!....

Pig#1: Me?

Policeman: Weren't you standing over there before?

Pig #1: No, no, that wasn't me. That was Charlie.

Policeman: And weren't there SEVEN pigs? Where are the rest of you? I count one... two... Stop moving around!

Pig #1: Seven? Why, no, officer. I don't know what you're talking about. (Psst, Charlie- your turn again with the mustache!)

Policeman (muttering): Lying swine.

Just imagine the lineup!

Anyway, according to the article, the giraffe kicked a hole in their cage, and the menagerie decided to hit the town, wandering through a local neighborhood at 5:30am.

Police spokesman Arnout Aben is quoted as saying, "You have to imagine somebody rubbing his eyes first thing in the morning and saying, 'Am I seeing things or is that 15 camels walking past?'"

Prior to proper caffeination, I doubt I'd even question a quantity of camels if they came by my window. I have put the creamer away in the kitchen cabinet. I've left my home wearing two different socks. Just this morning, I found myself in a situation where I had three contact lenses...

Impromptu circuses only mean I'm still working on Cup of Coffee #1.

But really-- to me, this news story sort just sounded like the beginning to a joke. So here goes:

A giraffe, 15 Bactrian camels, two zebras, five llamas and three pot belly pigs walk into a bar.

The giraffe says to the bartender, "We'll have 15 very dry double martinis, two black and tans, five Mountain Dews, three Wild Pig chardonnays and pour me a beer."

"You want that beer long-necked or on-tap?" asked the bartender.

The giraffe rolls his eyes. "What do you think?"

Goodnight, folks! I'll be here all week. Enjoy the veggie plate. :)

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At Humor-Blogs the animals always run free.

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hollywood's already bought the rights ...

(funnnnnnny)

Unknown said...

JD- It was totally nutty. I don't normally do two posts in a day, but this one just HAD to be written about. :)

Miss Shirl said...

How funny! I would run outside and bring all of the neighborhood kids in. They are wild animals even though held in captivity.

Da Old Man said...

It's a plot for a Pixar movie. "Back to the Jungle 2, Escape to Murphy's Bar and Grill."

Opening scene: Grasshopper walks up to bar and orders a cocktail. Bartender says, "We have a cocktail named after you?"

Grasshopper says, "No kidding, you have a cocktail called a Lenny?"

crpitt said...

Did you know that llamas are so domesticated that you could have one living in your house :)

I don't think any of the other beasts would be a good fit though.

Absolutely love the graphic you did with this post.

Unknown said...

Shirley- Now this would be a very different sort of Stranger Danger. :)

DaOldMan- Please tell me you weren't able to make that Grasshopper joke off the cuff... Please tell me you know that from somewhere. Otherwise I TOTALLY bow to your comedic brainpower. :)

Ah, our Claire-- The Llama Queen... Knows more facts about Llamas than anyone else her side of the pond. :) (They were terribly cute in the photos you'd taken... I can see why you love them now.) Thanks regarding the graphic. I am figuring out the Curve feature on MS Word. :)

Alice said...

Oh, think how wonderful that would be to see all that walking by your window! I got a kick the day I found a chameleon and a hedgehog on my way to school in Kenya. And I don't think I ever got used to seeing zebras along the side of the road.

Greg said...

Oh, very well done!!

Unknown said...

Alice- Oh I would have loved that, too. Hedgehogs just seem so marvelous. And me, I get happy when one of the neighborhood cats comes to greet me. So zebras and hedgehogs would be just too wonderful.

Greg- It just had to be done. I don't usually do stuff from the headlines, but when giraffes stage jailbreaks, something must be penned! :)

Queen Goob said...

LOL - I wouldn't have looked twice either,if i hadn't had my first cup of coffee. Okay, maybe twice if I saw the giraffe but only because I love giraffes!

Congrats on the award (from Alice) and I'll be around!

Sláinte!

Anonymous said...

Shirley

Are you saying that the neighbor kids are wild in your area? I've known some kids like that.

I'd be convinced I was dreaming and would go back to bed. My dogs would probably have coronaries, hmmm wonder if the neighbor dog would get so frenzied he'd blow a gasket.

Unknown said...

Chyna- I think Shirley was thinking more along the lines of "Child Rescued from Angry Llama" sort of headlines. :) But you never know.

Oh yes, any neighborhood dogs wouldn't know what to do with themselves!

Unknown said...

Queen Goob- Thanks for visiting!

crpitt said...

Llama queen! hah :)

You will have to do a MS word tutorial for me :)

Unknown said...

Claire of Many Llamas- In all seriousness, I can probably pull something together for you in terms of that. A lot of it is trial an error for me (mostly error!). The trick is to not get too ambitious in the images you try to make. Keep it simple!

Anonymous said...

Ha! That's so funny! I love the bit with the pigs swapping moustaches! ROFL!

Wow, those giraffes can really kick. Apparently they can kill a lion, so it doesn't surprise me that they broke out. Shoulda had a stronger cage.

Unknown said...

Jay- Heh, I think I might have been watching too much Wallace and Gromit lately. :)

I had no idea those skinny giraffe legs were so powerful. Who knew they were like Jackie Chan?

Anonymous said...

Proof that CP9 really exist. I'm sure most of you have no idea what I'm talking about! XD

Unknown said...

XD- Heh, are you suggesting the giraffe has some sort of special military ops powers? :)