Cat Alarm Operational Instructions

Congratulations on your purchase of this finely crafted Cat Alarm, (10 pound, shorthaired white van model). We hope you will enjoy its exquisite functionality and streamlined style.

Your Cat Alarm will go off each day-- no need to set it; it is entirely self-setting.

Upon going off, the alarm will subsequently need to recharge using meat-based Kibble(tm) charging dock. (Sold separately)

You may expect your Cat Alarm to operate according to the following preset phases, assuring a timely wakeup each day, possibly several hours before you even need to rise:

1. Gentle purring motor and Nuzzle(tm) motion 
2. Level two Headbutt(tm) technology 
3. Runaway locomotive racing action 
4. Close proximity "purr blast" capabilities 
5. Snuggle on-head wake-up features 
6. Single claw to the cranium final phase mode 

We hope you and your handcrafted Cat Alarm will enjoy many years of efficient wake-up calls.