Yield to the Power of the Scround


I'd just published the latest post to my thrifting blog and-- beeewwwwwp!--- my computer shut down, the overhead lights winked out, and I heard my housemate in her room say, "Awwww!"

This was at 2:30 yesterday afternoon.

A summer storm had come and went, and took the power with it. I blinked at the blank computer screen a moment, willing it back to life.

Electricity doesn't work on will, in case you were wondering. If it did, Uri Gellar would stop pretending to bend spoons with his mind and would move on to generating something actually useful.

I spent five minutes wandering around my house like a lost soul as it poured down outside, thinking apparently that by pacing from room-to-room, the lights might come back on again.

They didn't.

So-- what to do? Well, I thought, I could finally clean out that one cabinet and-- er, no. I'd need to, oh, see to do that.

I could change the linens-- but no, ditto the darkness issue.

Have a cup of tea and kick back? Well, the stove is electric and so is the microwave. Kibosh the tea.

I settled down in the living room, by the bay window, with a book. The housemate seemed to have a similar idea. And after two hours or so, I began to worry.

And not about whether I'd be able to get up in the morning on time without my electric alarm clock...

Not about the fact my car was trapped in my garage because the garage door was on electric power...

Not about how I would get ready with no blow-drier, no curling iron...

Not about the fact there was a nice steak thawing in the fridge for dinner that might go to waste...

And amazingly, not how I would even know who I was without coffee in the morning.

No, I started to worry-- strangely-- about the scround of peach Breyers ice cream in the freezer. The beautiful, sweet, creamy, as-yet-untouched-by-a-scoop half-gallon of frozen fruity goodness. Fatty, fabulous Breyers ice cream which I hadn't had in years and had planned to treat myself with. And if the power didn't come back in time, well, that scround would be a goner.

Cut off in its prime.

More time passed. The black skies yielded to sun, and still, no hum of the refrigerator. No woosh of the central air. The book was entertaining, and there was at least lunch meat for sandwiches for dinner but...

The scround. What about the scround?

The sun began its decent behind the bigger houses on the street above. My book grew closer and closer to the tip of my nose, and at 8:45 it became fairly obvious that my evening's entertainment was rapidly coming to an end. I brushed my teeth in the dark, still wide awake, still thinking whether I could get away with not washing my hair for one day, and where I could pick up some java, and how I would find matching clothes and...

That poor lost scround.

I lay there in the dark, thinking what I might post today if there was time. And about emails that went unanswered, and visitors ignored and again, what about that coffee and...

Beeeeeewwwp! A huff of air, the beep of an answering machine, the click of the clock.

"Yaaaayy!" cheered the housemate from her room.

Thank goodness, I thought. The ice cream probably made it.

A scround is a terrible thing to waste.

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11 comments:

Da Old Man said...

Okay, Jenn. You sent me to dictionary.com. Scround? How did you know that word?
I couldn't concentrate on anything else. You continue to amaze and educate.
Glad you and the ice cream survived the ordeal.

Jenn Thorson said...

Da Old Man- Humor writer James Lileks (Lileks.com) had taught me the beauty of the word "scround" a few years ago. It is both square and round at the same time. Thus, its scroundedness. :) I simply couldn't write about ice cream without using it!

Always Home and Uncool said...

When the power goes, I always start drinking all the beer in the 'fridge. It's never the same after it warms then re-cools. Hop deteriation, ya know.

Or so I tell the wife.

Found you through Humorbloggers.

Jenn Thorson said...

AlwaysHome- But, see, you're just being frugal. Cost-effective. In fact, you're doing HER a favor, as well, by clearing some extra space out of the fridge. It's a win-win! :)

Thanks for the info on HumorBloggers! OffendedBlogger rocks. :)

Greg said...

Well, first..."scround"?!?!?! I get it from context in comments now, but what the...

...and I hate to be the first one to point this out, but are all of your SPOONS electric, too??

The Universe was BEGGING you to enjoy the treat now(well, then), on a Sunday afternoon, as reward for your having gotten the new post up just in the nick.

I'm glad it didn't last too much longer...sounds like it was a long, hot Sunday. Imagine how much nicer with all that ice cream...

; )

Jenn Thorson said...

Greg- So that quitting smoking thing is making you just a wee bit... cranky... methinks. :)

Perhaps you need to track down your friend, the lovely neighborhood ice cream truck lady to get a Good Humor buzz going.

And to answer your question, yep, "scround". I am shocked and appalled and horrified (and okay not really surprised at all because I know I am weird and obscure) to see that I'm the only person on the Eastern part of the US that uses the word "scround."

As for the spoons, I planned to Savor the Moment. To Pace Myself ice cream-wise. The Universe is more likely to help me gain an extra ten pounds than to give me an Enjoy Ice Cream Now card. I was hoping to distribute those ten pounds over a several week period.

Da Old Man said...

I just got hit with a wave of sadness. I never get ice cream in scrounds. I'm more a Ben and Jerry's pint of Cherry Garcia classic rock and roll ice cream kind of guy. And no other food comes in scrounds.
I'll probably live out my days without ever enjoying food from scrounds. *sigh*

chyna said...

I was thinking the same thing Greg. You would have saved yourself all that stress if you had just ate the ice cream. YOu missed a golden opportunity to just gorge for the sake of the scround. You should have taken one for the team. LOL

Jenn Thorson said...

DaOldMan- And ice cream really is the only thing that comes in scrounds, too. It is wholly unique to that wonderful treat. Ah, well! A pint of Ben and Jerry's is a thing of beauty as well.

Chyna- Meh, the guilt would have outweighed the enjoyment. And me, I'd now be outweighing everything and everybody! :) ("Taken one for the team"... shakes head.)

unfinishedrambling said...

I have to go with the other folks here: "Scround? What the hey?" or something stronger depending on the way they talk. Oh, and you are definitely weird and obscure. Speaking of weird and obscure, I'm glad you had the reference to what your name meant. It sounded vaguely familiar, but I wouldn't have guessed Carroll.

Jenn Thorson said...

Unfinishedrambling- Hey, I was going for a whole "Weird and Obscure theme," so glad to hear it was successful. :)

Now that you know the word "scround" you should use it liberally at parties and really impress (read: confuse) your family and friends. Just see what a hit you'll be!