Something must be in the water. Or the air. Or rotting along the Internet Highway. Because PC crashes and Internet access problems this week seem to be mysteriously rampant among my online friends.
So to console the folks who've been dealing with this Earth-shattering lack of connectivity lately, I was inspired to write a little song. It's done to the tune of "The Day the Music Died," so before we leap right into it, I'd like to send many, many apologies to Don McLean.
Many.
Oh, so many.
Okay, that said, here we go:
The Day the PC Died
(VERSE ONE)
Just late last week or so
I can still remember how the Web, it used to make me smile
And I knew if I could log-on
I'd have readers saying, "blog on!"
And maybe they would Follow for a while
But I pushed the button, and I shivered
The silence, how it made me quiver
Virus, maybe malware?
The screen, it gave a blank stare
I can't remember if I cried
When I powered up and it just sighed
The loss, I felt it deep inside
The day the PC died
(REFRAIN)
So, bye-bye Tweets from good Stephen Fry
Took my PC to the GeekSquad and they said they would try
While great new toys for Wii were waving goodbye, saying,
Chin up, dude, you're starting to cry
Chin up, dude, there's no need to cry
(VERSE TWO)
Do you hold PCs aloft?
And do you have faith in Microsoft
Because Bill Gates has told you so?
Do you believe in service fees
Can virus scans save our PCs?
And can you teach the clever tricks you know?
Well, I see that you charge by the hour
I found the rates there at the counter
It's so much cash to lose
But withdrawal makes me sing the blues
I am a lonely, Tweeting, blogging Stumbler
With my sleek workstation I made my fumble
Then I saw my Web world crumble
The day the PC died
I started singin'
(REFRAIN)
Bye-bye Tweets from good Stephen Fry
Took my PC to the GeekSquad and they said they would try
While great new toys for Wii were waving goodbye, saying,
Chin up, dude, you're starting cry...
Chin up, dude, there's no need to cry...
(VERSE THREE)
Now for four days I've been on my own
I have a laptop, it's on loan
But it's just not the same to me
When I log-on, the apps don't know my name
And the forums they don't look the same
And my fingers tend to hit wrong keys
And while I waited for that phone call
To say it's fixed and here's the last bill
Trouble's new direction
Zapped my whole connection
Yes, seems some jerk in a Corvette Shark
Hit a power line outside our office park
We sang dirges in the dark
The day the PCs died
We were singin'
(REFRAIN)
Bye-bye Tweets from good Stephen Fry
Took our PCs to the GeekSquad and they said they would try
While great new toys for Wii were waving goodbye, saying,
Chin up, dudes, you're starting to cry
Chin up, dudes, there's no need to cry
Everybody sing!
----------------------------
Humorbloggers
Humor-blogs
Bloggerella
29 comments:
That's priceless. Well done. I'm gonna be singing your refrain in my head all day now.
NoNameDufus- Thank you, thank you. :) And TGIF to you!
Great spoof. Fortunately, I have multiple connections from multiple systems, several at discrete locations. I'll survive anything short of a massive EMP.
P.S.: Heard the Weird Al spoof of American Pie based on Star Wars Episode I?
Aoi- Good to know you are entirely secure and won't be dropping off the face of the Internet any time soon! I do believe I have heard the Weird Al version, but it was a long, long time ago. Or maybe I'm thinking of Weird Al's Star Wars take on "Lola"-- "Yoda." That was pretty brilliantly done.
Great one! Ahh, Lord of the Tweets Stephen Fry even gets a mention.
My PC situation went from bad to worse this week - I got infected with that rogue anti-virus trojan. It took hours and several late nights to remove and has made a mess of my computer. I couldn't update my blog until today... the horror!
Tiggy- You were actually one of the people I was thinking about. I'd read you either on Twitter or Humor Bloggers talking about it. And Ken Armstrong was offline most of yesterday. And I guess DeadRooster has had to switch to a different computer because of problems. And Chat Blanc has had issues, too.
It just seems to have hit a lot of folks.
Excellent. I had my computer problems a few weeks ago. It was an internet/cable situation.
Da Old Man- Ah, yes-- when you were Amish. :) I remember your Amish Buggy days.
was here for blogwalking in blogcatalog, wow nice and good site in here, can we make a friends.....
Thank heavens I have a Mac! ROFL!
Very nice!
I'm currently holding a cross at my cable box attempting to scare off any evil spirits.
Jay- Heh, me too! I was struggling really hard not to rub it in. :)
ReformingGeek- That should do it. Maybe say a few Hail McAffees, too.
What's a PC problem ?
Ok so I am a minority ! (No I am not a mac user either)
Wow ! What a great song !
And down stairs among the sound of machinery I could hear the classics radio station being played.
So I may have sung this in a more slower rhythm and a more sad tone.
:)
Jaffer- Did you treat your coworkers to a serenade?
Goodness no ! (I sung it in my head and hummed a little)
It's Friday and I rather bid my co-workers goodbye in a rather upbeat tone !
This is me giving you a standing ovation, Jenn. And sniffling a bit. But in a manly way. Always in a manly way...
Oh, alright then. I'm blubbering like a big, overgrown baby... dang it all! :p
Jaffer- Heh, they were probably either wondering what was up, then, or whether you didn't have an exciting weekend planned. :)
Tony- Ah, thank you, thank you! Here is a virtual hankie for your manly, manly tears. :)
hahaha! I definitely think that needs to be recorded for all to hear. :D
Gawd, Jenn. How timely! Unbeknownst to you, I, too, have been plagued this week. The graphics card on my desktop committed suicide last weekend, and I've been reduced all week to working on my eensy weensy netbook. So thanks for the song. I can relate!
Bobbie
P.S. New graphics card got installed earlier today by my in-house Geek Squad (husband), so I'm whole again.
Chat Blanc- You would have been laughing if you were around as I wrote the thing-- I was singing it out trying to get the meter right... I unfortunately don't have Don McLean's range. :)
Bobbie- You're right, I did not know! See, what is up with the universe right now and computing? Have bad guys just released a lot of viruses into the world at the same time, or what?
Glad things are getting solved on your end, though.
You do need to sing this and download it to youtube.
It will be the next viral video.
:)
Maybe it's you that are causing all the problems...the common connection seems to be you, which means...uh oh. Well, it was fun reading your blog while it lasted ;).
And I'm so out of the Twitter loop, who's Stephen Fry? I just added The Bloggess, Dooce and Paula Poundstone and thought I was doing so good too.
BRAVO!!!!
That is awesome. Truly well done and hilarious. Just . . . awesome!!!
This is fantastic. . . I just sang this to my wife and we're both laughing (reading this on a mac)
Da Old Man- Heh- only for embarrassing myself. I know that sells, but still... :)
UnfinishedDude- Stephen Fry is a popular British comedian, a very funny fellow, who also Twitters. He's got quite a Twitter following. He was in Jeeves and Wooster, Blackadder, and has worked with Hugh Laurie quite a bit.
JD- So glad you enjoyed it! It was a lot of fun to write.
Koe Whitton-Williams- Ha-you made my day with that-- thank you for the impromptu performance! I'm also glad the song is being passed along and enjoyed.
Fantastic! ha ha! I don't think Don would be offended ;O)
Beetle- Ah good! My heart was in the right place, anyway. I don't think he'd begrudge that. :)
I agree, sing it and post it on youtube.
The laptop I have been using since I became disabled a year and a half ago bit the dust last week. Now I am at the mercy of my partner for a less painful online experience. My desktop, besides being situated uncomfortably, is likely one of the slowest on the planet. I literally had a panic attack my first blogless day.
Lola- I can understand, I hear the withdrawal symptoms are dicey! Here's wishing you a nice new laptop soon, and better bloggy days.
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