Growing Up Personist

Sujatha over at Fluff-n-Stuff had tagged me for a meme. And unlike most memes, this one was so straightforward that-- instead of piddling around with six facts, or five lies, or 100 things, or seven dwarfs or three stooges or whatnot-- it just stormed right on to one big ol' loaded question:

Are you a feminist?

Now, Sujatha, knowing my deeply philosophical work-- (ahem)-- recognized instantly that this question might need a bit of Cabbagization to fit well here...

That hot-button topics that get folks sniping at each other and throwing chairs and burning their bras, are things that we here at Cabbages try to steer clear of.

Mainly because I believe in reupholstering chairs, not flinging them... And one of my blogging friends is, oddly enough, a bra, so that fire thing is right out... And also, I simply prefer Cabbages to be a snipe-free zone.

So Sujatha had suggested that I might want to do an LOLCats treatment on the topic or something. Of course, I would never do anything like that.


It's so overdone these days. Everybody's doing it, and see, I believe in taking the road less traveled.

So what was I talking about? Oh yes. Feminism. Am I a feminist?

Well, let's take a look at the dictionary definition of "Feminism."

Merriam-Webster defines feminism as:

"The theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes."

And hey, Equal is good! I mean, when I pour myself a cup of coffee, the first thing I do is reach for Equal.

Wait, is that the one that comes in the little pink packets? No?

Oh.

Well, bugger.

But the thing about feminism these days is, most of us females born in the U.S. in the 70s have not had to actively battle for rights, to enjoy a reasonable amount of equality in our lives.

I mean, yes, growing up, my dad pretty well refused to even look for anything for himself in the refrigerator. Oh, this man-- who is clever enough to have built his own underwater sound recording equipment-- would stand helplessly in front of the fridge searching for the ketchup right in front of him, seemingly unable to recognize the famous Heinz bottle unless it was placed directly in his hand.

Which my frustrated mother would eventually do, just to get the room temperature back to normal.

But in 70s America, things they were a-changing. Girls enjoyed Barbies and dress-up, but playing in the mud and with cars was okay, too. We had role models like Wonder Woman, but we still watched Leave it to Beaver reruns. And if we chose to wear make-up and heels? It was because we wanted to wear them... rarely because the dress code said we should.

In the 80s, we could sport a tie and trousers á la Annie Hall... Or a gown to the prom á la Carrie-- er, sorry-- Molly Ringwald.... Molly Ringwald. It was a time some of our moms started to have jobs outside the home, some of our dads helped pick up the slack.

And going to college? For many of the girls in my class, college was a given. Although, of course, if everyone followed through with their high school plans, that also meant we graduated a whopping 75 veterinarians...

Yep, if a dog ate a sock anywhere in Northern New Jersey, one of my classmates would be there to remove it.

As for me-- I can, and have, changed my own flat tire. But still appreciate that guys would offer to help. I like it when a door is held, but am just as willing to hold doors for my fellow humans, too-- male or female. I mean, a certain amount of civility to other folks really shouldn't be too much to expect....

Unless, apparently, you're at TJ Maxx or Marshalls. Then, it seems it's everyone for themselves.

So when that question, "Are you a feminist?" comes up, I have to think about it. Feminism conjures images of speeches and demonstrations.... power struggles and pepper spray.

If anything, I'm just some lazy-butt gal who's had the good fortune of growing up in a place and time where I reaped the benefits of the shake-up before me. I seem to have reached it just when Girl Power first started really digging its heels in-- whether they're sensible shoes or four inch stilettos. I had the luxury of growing up more, er, personist.

I believe in personism for everybody.

There's still some room for improvement, of course. Only-- I don't know-- now we've got LOLCats pushing their own agenda, we've seen that pro-cat propaganda take off like wildfire...

Some movements simply can't be stopped.