Tag-- Er, I'm It!


One of my writer friends, Whitney of the Write in Life blog, tagged me with something called "the 777 Challenge." This is a game where instead of pegging me with a dusty eraser in the head, as one does in an effective tag if I recall properly (I might not recall properly due to eraser/head impact), Whitney asked me to complete a feat of blogly derring-do...

A little like Festivus' feats of strength, really, but with sentences.

The task is to post seven sentences from my latest work in progress from either the seventh or 77 page of the book. And then tag seven other authors to do the same.

"Easy," you say. "Who can't type in a few sentences from something you've already written?" But see, usually I don't let people look, touch or even breathe on stuff I have in first draft form.

I mean, first draft work is so bad that even I don't really want to have to look at it. Only I do. Because, well, much like the dishes in my sink, no one will get it done for me. Also like crusty dishes, I feel it stinks more when I expose a first draft to air. Usually things have to have a good fifth draft or so before they're all all scrubbed and shiny enough to meet a friend or two.

So, I want it noted that I will probably be having heart palpitations about this, sending seven stinking crap, unedited first draft sentences out into the world to fight their own battles when they are so young and weak and smelly.

But because Whitney asked-- and also because I haven't posted in a while and have been feeling guilty-- here goes. This is from page seven of the second There Goes the Galaxy book I've been working diligently on, called The Purloined Number.

"So you know what this means, don't you?" mused the eldest being. "This means this isn't just any Protostar 340-K. This is Captain What's-His-Name's--" 
"Rolliam Tsmorlood," input Strah. 
"--Rolliam Tsmorlood's Protostar 340-K. This isn't just one of the worst ships ever made in the Greater Communicating Universe. This is a pivotal entertainment prop once owned by an historic Underworld figure who was exiled to Altair-5 for his crimes, and likely is at the bottom of a tarpit by now."

Phew! That hurt a little. And I hope you had your gasmasks on.

Okay, now, the second part of this mighty challenge is to tag seven other writers and task them to do the same thing. But, see, the thing is, most people I know really hate being tagged.

So here's the deal-- if the challenge seems fun to you and you're working on a writing project, I say-- feel free to tag yourself. This is like a blank check for tagging. Tag away.

I have no fulfilled my part of of the tag challenge. I'm going to go have a cold compress and lie down.

Oh, and if you're curious about There Goes the Galaxy, my thoroughly-edited book that does not make me nauseous or fearful to share, it's available in paperback and Kindle version here on Amazon, and for Nook here.


Sorry, Dolly-- 9 to 5 Star Wars Parody Spoof from Stormtrooper Perspective


Someone on G+ had posted the graphic above, and it got me feeling musical all over. So I couldn't help but try my hand at the song this image so desperately wanted to be paired with.

Please do not crush my trachea with your mind because of it. I need my trachea. It's been so good to me.



Tumble out of bed and you stumble to Cantina
Get yourself a bowl of farina and--
Look, it's laser fire!-- you'd better dive!
Jump in formation and your blood starts pumping
Darth looks your way and your heart starts jumping
When Friday comes you hope you're still alive...


Chorus: 
Hope you're still alive
What a way to earn some space cash
Barely getting by
When there's not much rebel backlash
Want to march ahead
But ol' Darth won't recognize you
Dressed in uniform like all the guys do...


Well, you'd try lead but your neck might shatter
You're just one point in the Dark Side's data
But you've got schemes; those droids can't get away
You're in the same troop as a lot of your friends
Just a-waiting for an escape pod to retirement
But the tractor beam's on and it's all gonna tow you away



Chorus: 
Hope you're still alive
What a way to earn some space cash
Barely getting by
When there's not much rebel backlash
Want to march ahead
But ol' Darth won't recognize you
Dressed in uniform like all the guys do...